'When's smoko?'

@Laurie: Well... did you start them on a diet of bread and water, and then told them to earn their keep in order to progress to cereals and grains? My wee one weighed 5 kgs (sorry, the Metric System is king where I'm from) for the first year or so because she wouldn't do any housework; crawl over there and return to whence she came...that's all she ever did! Then, as soon as she found her feet, as it were, I introduced her to a broom. We progressed to hoses and wheelbarrows. The next stage in her evolution is to introduce power tools into her list of daily pursuits. She now weighs about 14 kgs, although she works off most of what she puts on thanks to all the chores I have assigned to her. As with the information on the post, I am, of course, only kidding. I love my girl to death and she seems to love doing new things, especially when they involve water. :) Thanks for the comment(s) Laurie. PS It's never too late!!!

@Amanda: Yes, it does. I hope that doesn't infringe any copyright laws! ;) Thanks for your creative interpretation. :D